Pediatric cancer victim teaches fraternity brothers about life

Pediatric cancer victim teaches fraternity brothers about life

By Asten Smith

STATE COLLEGE -- For the fraternity brothers of Phi Delta Theta at Penn State University, they said they have learned a lot this year, although they're not referring to lessons found in their textbooks or a professor's lecture. The young men said they learned how to live and how to love through an unlikely teacher.

It was the energetic and enthusiastic spirit of seven-year-old Kallan Hammaker that taught them so many lessons in life they won't soon forget. Sitting around a table at the fraternity house, four of the brothers, Eli Bohemond, Kevin Haslam, Nick Wagner and Colby Wesner, recalled one of their fondest and most recent memory of the little girl and her family this past Christmas.

The grown men spoke with smiles on their faces as they described their involvement in a fantasy "monster and princess" game Kallan created and had them playing for much of the day with her and her little sister, five-year-old Krystian.

"We played that game for hours," said Mr. Haslam with a laugh. That day, the brothers ate a holiday meal with the Hammakers and brought gifts for the girls. The girls particularly liked their Penn State t-shirts, teddy bears, and hats.

Kallan and her family became very close to the Phi Delta Theta brothers over the years as their adoptive "Thon" family through the Penn State Inter-Fraternity Council/Panhellenic Dance Marathon, better known as "Thon." The largest student-run philanthropy in the world has raised over $45 million benefiting the Four Diamonds Fund, an organization that supports children receiving treatment for pediatric cancer at Penn State Children's Hospital in Hershey. "Thon" reached its 35th anniversary this year and raised a record $5.2 million. The year-long fundraising concludes during "Thon Weekend," a no sitting or sleeping two-day dance marathon.

Mr. Wesner, of Mifflinburg, met Kallan when she was four years old and said that for the Hammakers and so many "Thon" families, Thon weekend was like a holiday on the calendar. The Hammakers were still able to attend this year despite Kallan's health declining.

"She wanted to smile but she was playing a tough card," said Mr. Bohemond. All four brothers danced at this year's "Thon." They still have the Spongebob and Batman necklaces she gave them. Mr. Wagner, also of Mifflinburg, danced for the first time this year and remembered how warm and friendly Kallan was the first time he met her. The timid little girl he met at the beginning of the visit was giving him hugs and kisses goodbye just a few hours later. The goodbye hugs and kisses quickly became her goodbye routine.

Kallan may not have had any biological big brothers of her own, but instead she inherited a handful of big brothers at Phi Delta Theta. "She considered us all like big brothers and Krystian considered us boyfriends," Mr. Haslam said as the brothers laughed in agreement.

The brothers said their relationship with Kallan taught them how to live. Kallan often asked the question, "What are we going to do tomorrow?" The brothers of Phi Delta Theta said she was always living for the next day.

On April 9, Kallan passed away after battling pediatric cancer. The brothers said they will always carry with them the lessons she taught them.

Mr. Wesner recalled an e-mail from Kallan's mother, Lora. Mrs. Hammaker talked about Kallan's paralysis that had occurred in her legs shortly before her passing and that even in a wheelchair, Kallan wasn't deterred and continued to attend school. The weekend before her death, Kallan, who was always thinking about tomorrow, asked her father, Scott, to bring her schoolwork home so she wouldn't fall behind. Mr. Bohemond said Kallan's resilient spirit taught him not to complain over minor inconveniences such as a case of the common cold.

Her death made them all realize how much they as a fraternity have been impacted by the Hammakers and how in turn they impacted the lives of Mom, Dad, Kallan, and Krystian. Mr. Wesner said he realized how close the brothers and the Hammaker family had become when the family asked that he and six other brothers serve as pale bearers at Kallan's funeral. Adam Dahr, Phil Donegan, Mr. Haslam, Nate Killough, Mr. Wagner, and Mr. Wesner felt honored to be asked to carry Kallan to her final resting place.

Mr. Wesner, speaking at Kallan's funeral, said her passing on his birthday gives a new meaning now to what the day represents for him.

"It's ironic that Kallan passed away on my birthday. Here, passing away on this date will just give that much more meaning to the celebration of my life. Her courage, strength, and enthusiasm have taught me more about life than her 7-year-old mind could understand," he said during the service. Mr. Wesner went on to say that it was her visit to this year's dance marathon that was all he needed to sustain him for 48 hours. He added, "My relationship with her and the things that she unknowingly taught me, have given me enough motivation and courage to dance my way through the rest of my life, wherever it may take me -- and whatever cards I might be dealt."

The young men are in their last years at Penn State. Some will be graduating in the spring and may not be sure of what they're going to do tomorrow, much like Kallan would often wonder, but they do know the lessons they learned from their young teacher will be the most valuable knowledge they will take from their experiences in college.

"I go through life like a journey. I figured a lot out at college. Nothing helped me figure more out than Kallan," said Mr. Haslam.

n E-mail comments to asmith@dailyitem.com.

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